rocky

Don’t really have an explanation, but the movie Rocky is what came to mind today (10 FEB 2023). This quote just resonated in the moment. “You’re gonna eat lightning, you’re gonna crap thunder!” -Rocky, the 1976 movie!

I came across the above saved in my drafts and I immediately began weeping, yes weeping, not just a little cry…a shaking, sobbing, wailing caused by overwhelming sadness because my brother Mad/Maddy/Madison left earth in July and I never published this and I had written the dedication to him and MW; however, hadn’t shared it with them. sigh.

Now, here I sit, having difficulty grasping that our dear Maddy has really relocated. People all around ask how we are doing and I’m unclear what to say. Why do we ask others how they’re doing when the unthinkable, inexplicable and devastating has occurred?

Miss you Maddy. I know you’re happy and whole and free with Opa, Nonnie, Aunt Norma, Uncle Scott, GrandPa and GrandMa Kamp as well as many others on the other side.

Hugs, dear Maddy.

To all who know loss and grief, here…in it, with you. Hugs (or dap, if you prefer).

We are not alone in the sadness, anger, despair…all of it…including the moments of joy and laughter and celebrations as well…some chocolate, coffee, a slice of sugar, a cup of chai…together.

In it ALL…together.

Common Day Hero: You are so dearly loved and held in thoughts and prayers always. Opa’s work ethic, humor and curiosity live on through you. Today, I dedicate this post to you, my two vanilla brothers, MW and Mad.

family

One of these things (ok a few!) are not like the others!

My family peach (some of youS know I callS dem Sauerkraut and French Vanilla coz dey German and Cajun descent!); me and my kids brownies (mixed w/all kinds of goodness!); all of us delicious and sweet…just different!

We chose/choose to love each other and we decided we’d be family by choice.

We’s family fahevAH coz the external never determined our internal -this love runs deep coz the blood of humans got NothiN on the water of Amma (Wise Spirit), Yeshu (Kind Jesus) and Abba (Most Loving Heavenly Father)…

Family is comprised of the people we choose to have in our lives (not limited to the people in our lives since or because of birth).

Through the years, I’ve had the joy of being a part of many “families”. Long before being inclusive was cool, I saw inclusion modeled and it helped me genuinely love all people.

Who are the people who dance with you through the delightful, walk with you through all the muck and despite our humanity, love and extend grace on the journey? That’s family!

Family isn’t hiding. Family isn’t covering up or pretending reality isn’t real. Family stands, sits, crawls with us through it all. Family isn’t just here for the fun times.

Family is fahevAH. Family is fah real.

Family is committed to caring, listening, helping and growing together…in every way. When we had no family, Heaven came down and offered all of us the gift of Love, Peace and Belonging.

My heart empathizes with those who have no “blood family” present – sending love, light and strength your way so that you’re able to create a family of your own ~ a mix of your closest people.

Common Day Hero: You continue to come to mind multiple times this month. You had me laughing coz you’d say you couldn’t have time w/God until you put your makeup on…ya still doing that in the afterlife? You are so missed and thought of often here. Grandma Kamp, I dedicate this post to you.

family

Family.

“The descendants of a common ancestor” is one of the meanings the dictionary lists.

In addition to “blood”, I know “family” to be the people with whom I choose to keep healthy bonds, commitments and traditions regardless of background, heritage, ethnicity, etc.

There are people in my life whom I consider family; they aren’t “blood” and, at times, they’ve been more present in all the ways when blood couldn’t or chose not to be.

There have been those whom I became so attached to, but they didn’t share the same vibes or sentiments. That’s extremely painful…and quite a lesson – EverY time!

My nature is such that I love ALL people (thanks to my Dad) and most animals (thanks to my Mom!).

Learning and reLearning healthy boundaries…sigh. Finally accepting behaviors instead of just listening to words without supporting evidence/matching behavior.

Loving fully and freely – first myself, so that I can then from a healthy place love others well.

I AM loving myself first.

I AM loving myself fully and freely ~ the way The Divine loves me.

I AM taking care of myself in ALL the ways.

Are you in a place that feels like repeat? It is alright.

Grace upon grace to you fellow Warrior!

Are you prioritizing your own health ~ spiritually, emotionally, physically, mentally, relationally, financially?

If not, how can you take one step today towards healing? Remember, small steps towards big change!

Common Day Hero: I see your bold, brave heart shining through…always. You are a Warrior of a Woman, a devoted wife, a MARVELous Mom and so much more! You are seen…maybe not always by humans, but for shO by Heaven! Today, I dedicate this post to you, dear Kena.

family

In twenty-sixteen, I wrote out a family statement. I felt that creating a statement that we could say together, every morning before school, would be an encouragement for the kids. The kids were excited about it.

I hoped (hope) it would remind them of the Truth especially when the lies come at them. I hoped (still hope) it would be a “go-to” for them when they need to remember who they really are.

I revised the statement in twenty-eighteen, but we didn’t say the statement regularly after relocating that fall (the kids weren’t up for it…maybe because so much had been turned upside down in their world…sigh).

In the fall of twenty-twenty, amidst more unexpected changes (I know changes all year…for everyone worldwide!), I asked the kids if they’d like to start saying our family statement again. They said Yes!

This week, I asked the kids if they’d like to share our statement on the blog. They said Yes! My heart in sharing our family statement is so that if you choose, you may find inspiration in creating your own.

Here’s ours (actions and all!):

We raise our hand as if making an oath

I AM a child of God (point up)

I AM a Stanley (link arms)

I AM a believer (sign of the cross)

I AM loved (hands over heart)

I AM important (chest puffed out)

I AM powerful (muscles)

I AM a World Changer (swirling lasso above head)

Then, we bring our palms in and yell, GO Stanleys!

I’ve told my children that this statement is for us. We believe it. It is Truth to encourage and remind us of the unity and strength within us.

We may not be loved by all; that is alright because we love ourselves, God loves us and we love each other. We may not be important to all people, but we are important to our Creator and to each other. We need not be arrogant; we simply know that we are a vital part of this family and will bring good to the world.

We may feel powerless sometimes, but we are powerful to choose to live our lives to the fullest, to choose the direction of our dreams, to choose our response to the negatives hurled at or forced on us.

We choose to be world changers ~ where we see injustice, we speak up; where we see a need, we help with creative solutions. Remembering the Truth carries us through it all.

If creating a statement as a family (or for your family) is on your heart, here are a few questions to consider:

What is the message of your family or what do you want it to be? What will reassure/encourage your hearts and remind you of Truth? If you have very young children, you may only want three short sentences now. The statement can always be expanded, through the years, as you like.

Not everyone is about creating a statement. Would you prefer to write a song for your family? Would you prefer to choose a “family song”? Once a week, gather and play/sing the song then hug and reaffirm one another of how important the family is.

Common Day Hero: You are such a sweet spirit. You were a great mom to your three. Your kindness and your home were always such a safe space for me. Thank you for opening your heart and home to me. My friend Myra, I dedicate this post to you. I know you can see it from that mansion in the sky. I miss you dearly.

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