Tag: grieving

November 12, 2024 Post a Comment

rocky

Don’t really have an explanation, but the movie Rocky is what came to mind today (10 FEB 2023). This quote just resonated in the moment. “You’re gonna eat lightning, you’re gonna crap thunder!” -Rocky, the 1976 movie!

I came across the above saved in my drafts and I immediately began weeping, yes weeping, not just a little cry…a shaking, sobbing, wailing caused by overwhelming sadness because my brother Mad/Maddy/Madison left earth in July and I never published this and I had written the dedication to him and MW; however, hadn’t shared it with them. sigh.

Now, here I sit, having difficulty grasping that our dear Maddy has really relocated. People all around ask how we are doing and I’m unclear what to say. Why do we ask others how they’re doing when the unthinkable, inexplicable and devastating has occurred?

Miss you Maddy. I know you’re happy and whole and free with Opa, Nonnie, Aunt Norma, Uncle Scott, GrandPa and GrandMa Kamp as well as many others on the other side.

Hugs, dear Maddy.

To all who know loss and grief, here…in it, with you. Hugs (or dap, if you prefer).

We are not alone in the sadness, anger, despair…all of it…including the moments of joy and laughter and celebrations as well…some chocolate, coffee, a slice of sugar, a cup of chai…together.

In it ALL…together.

Common Day Hero: You are so dearly loved and held in thoughts and prayers always. Opa’s work ethic, humor and curiosity live on through you. Today, I dedicate this post to you, my two vanilla brothers, MW and Mad.

December 3, 2021

UNpleasant

For some of us, the holidays are not a pleasant season/experience. It’s a reminder of grief/s unresolved…and maybe some griefs, unexpected.

The holidays have me (and some others I know) remembering those who are no longer here. Some have transitioned from this earth and some are here, just no longer in our circle. Both seem deeply painful and at times, irreconcilable.

I don’t know of a formula for working through grief. sigh. From those who have shared their stories with me and my own experience, it seems a very personal and unique journey for each human. 

It’s easy to externally appear “well” because of pressure from family, work, friends, religious circles, our own inner critic. For some of us, it’s hiding in plain sight – with a bottle of pills or alcohol, with sugar, with anything that will have us feeling good momentarily.

This holiday season, I’m asking that we genuinely prioritize ourselves…that we take the time needed to grieve; to let ourselves feel and fully process.

This holiday season, as friends and family gather, if we need a moment, may we take the moment and walk away. If we need to decline some holiday party invites, may we do so. My heart is not that we isolate; my sincere hope is that we find a way to our healthiest rhythm.

If we need therapy, a support group, a book club, a dance class, yoga, pilates, an exercise buddy or group, a new hobby, a punching bag, a lifestyle change, more sleep, more water, an accountability partner… whatever it may be, may we move forward in it…now.

Happy Holidays ~ I understand it may not be “happy” but amidst it all, I wish us moments of sheer delight, laughter and happiness. I also wish us strength for this journey.

Proud of us for continuing to move forward.

I AM on the journey with (and for) you always, brave heart. 

Common Day Hero: You are such a loving and open heart to all around you. I see the strength of a thousand warriors within you. Shukriya for your kindness and hosting me even when you didn’t really know me. And always, thank you for the world’s best roti! Z-Ma, I dedicate this post to you.

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