I grew up being compared…by my parents, peers, educators and at times, strangers. Most of the time, it was well-intentioned. Unfortunately, it always left me feeling “less than”…still, I boarded the comparison roller coaster as a young child and remained on it well into adulthood.
Sadly, it seems comparison is “acceptable”…even in spiritual circles. I believe comparison has no place with the Divine; however, society has us comparing and categorizing our fellow humans. A few comparisons that immediately come to my mind are:
Sinner vs Saint
Light vs Dark
Tall vs Short
Slim vs Wide etc…
I’ve heard, oh he comes from a great family, but I come from a dysfunctional home. I believe we all come from dysfunctional homes. It’s just the level of dysfunction that varies.
Anytime we compare, we are diminishing (maybe even unintentionally extinguishing) the light of one individual and elevating another. This realization was the catalyst in my decision to break ties with comparison.
Comparison also kept/keeps me far from contentment. That roller coaster had me feeling on top of the world one minute and in the inconsolable depths of despair the next. Just when I thought I was on steady ground, comparison would come along…
I found myself reeling until I made the connection that comparison was blocking me from being content. I need not concern myself with who is (or appears) more intelligent, in better shape physically, more spiritual, more stable or financially wealthy. I AM content with who I AM.
Every time I choose to turn away from comparison, I experience great contentment. I maintain that state of being content by reminding myself that I lack nothing. I have everything I need to be who I am created to be.
My personal belief is that each of us was created with intrinsic value and unique gifts/talents. The beauty of accepting that at my core is that any offering I choose to bring to the world can only come from me. No one else has the distinct bent and flair with which I was made, so I need not compare. I AM content!
If I find myself comparing my children, I immediately call myself out and apologize to them. Both of my children feel that comparison has been (and is) a hindrance rather than a help. I share their sentiment and make a conscious effort to refrain from comparing them.
Is comparison keeping us from living our lives to the fullest? Comparison will continue to creep up, but we are powerful people. We have a choice to stop comparing, catch ourselves comparing and change course…daily. We can do this!
Common Day Hero: Your acceptance and love has been (and is) refreshing. I AM grateful for our friendship. Susie, I dedicate this post to you.
